Isabella Fire!
by TheDreweMaster
Summary: Phineas and Ferb parody of the Looney Tunes short, 'Rabbit Fire'. It is Suzy Johnson's first day of hunting, but with Isabella Bunny and Candace Duck saying whether it's 'Bunny Season' or 'Ducky Season', will her first try be a success?


_It is a mild, sunny day in the autumn country forest, filled with exotic orange-leaved trees and innocent woodland wildlife… a perfect day for hunting! And, speak of the devil, the door of a log cabin in the middle of the woods opens, and Suzy Johnson, a small, cute girl with curly blond hair and turquoise bows, wearing similar hunting clothes to Elmer Fudd, walks out of the door having an excited facial expression. She is carrying a large double-barrelled shotgun. Standing next to Suzy is her mother, Mrs. Johnson. The camera is at a low angle, so we can only see her legs. From what we can see, Mrs. Johnson is wearing a white apron, a pink dress; stockings of the same colour and brown galoshes._

Mrs. Johnson: Now, Suzy, be careful out there while hunting. You never know what types of animals there are in those woods!

Suzy: Mommy, you've seen from my training that I can take on any wild beasty! With this gun, I am Invinctible!

Mrs. Johnson: Oh, alright! Just be back before sunset.

Suzy: _(Running off into the woods)_ Okay, mommy! Bye bye!

Mrs. Johnson: Bye, Suzy, and good luck!

 _Later, further into the woods, Suzy is quietly sneaking around the trees, carrying her loaded shotgun with a devious smile on her face. She stops, turns to us and makes a shush sign._

Suzy: Shhh! Be very, very quiet. I'm hunting bunnies. _[High-Pitched Evil Giggle]_

 _She continues sneaking quietly through the woods, looking for a bunny to exterminate. Further up ahead, feet that look like they belong to a bunny are walking in the same direction that Suzy is walking, which are causing footprints in the ground. Back with Suzy, she very quickly finds the bunny footprints._

Suzy: Oh look, big bunny tracks! I'm gonna get a big bunny for sure!

 _With an evil grimace, she follows the big bunny tracks. Further up ahead with the bunny feet, the camera zooms out and it is revealed that it is not a bunny at all! It is Candace, in her Duck form, wearing rabbit shoes. Her feathers are dark-red; she has an orange-yellow beak and the legs of a duck with webbed feet. Her clothing is the same of her human form's, with the red shirt and white skirt, and her tail feathers poking out of the back of her skirt. She also has the orange hair and the extensively long neck with a white ring around it. Candace stops when she reaches a rabbit hole with a mail box near it, writing is inscribed on it saying, 'Isabella Bunny'. With a scheming smile, she turns around and sees Suzy not far behind and calls down the hole._

Candace: Yoo hoo! Isabella! Oh, Izzy! Are you home? I need you for a minute.

Isabella: _(off screen in rabbit hole)_ Yeah, I'm home, Candace! Just wait a minute and I'll be right there!

Candace: Ok, well make it quick! _(Growing a mischievous smirk)_ I've got something really interesting to show you!

 _Candace removes her bunny shoes and dashes off to hide behind a rock and watch the action. She turns towards us and grows a frown._

Candace: What?! It's a little thing called 'Survival of the Fittest'! It's a part of life for us animals! _(Looks over rock but then looks back at us)_

Candace: Anyway, it's fun. _[Evil Giggle] (Looks over rock)_

 _Back at Isabella's Rabbit Hole, Isabella, in her Bunny form, pokes her head out of the hole. She has bright pink fur with her rabbit ears pointing out of her black hair, which is the same shape of her human form's hair and has a small pink bow. She's wearing a fuchsia-pink sleeveless dress that stops above her knees, her cotton-tail pointing out of the dress, with a white short-sleeve T-shirt underneath and a deep purple belt. And on her hands, she is wearing white gloves that are a lot like Mickey Mouse's._

Isabella: Okay, Candace, what did you want to show me?

 _Suddenly, a bullet is shot through her hair from behind, catching her by surprise. Isabella turns around confused._

Isabella: _(Almost sounding like she is scolding)_ Hey, young lady! Whatcha doin'?!

 _Suzy runs up to Isabella and pushes the gun muzzle against her head with a hint of evil in her eyes._

Suzy: "What am I doing"? From the look of it you would guess I'm hunting bunnies, wouldn't you?

Isabella: Well, I'd guess so.

Suzy: Then I'd suggest you start saying your prayers, you ginormous, no good bunny! _[High-Pitched Evil Giggle]_

 _Isabella slowly pushes the gun away from her head, sits on the edge of her hole; pulls out a carrot from her hole and starts eating it. While eating she gives the audience a bored facial expression and looks back at Suzy._

Isabella: Say, young lady, _[Munching]_ aren't you a little young to be hunting cute, innocent bunnies like myself when it's Bunny Season?

 _She splutters some of the carrot out in Suzy's face, who shakes it off in aggression._

Suzy: No! I… _(Starts thinking if she is not too young to be hunting bunnies)_ I'm… um… I don't know. Am I? _(Pulls her gun back)_

Isabella: Yes, yes you are. You see, today, for the adults it is Bunny Season, but for the little kids, like you, it is Duck Season.

Suzy: Ducky Season?

Isabella: Correct! Ducky Season!

 _Outraged, Candace stomps out from behind her rock and towards Isabella and Suzy._

Candace: Say what?! Oh no, you don't! You're so busted, Isabella! You can't lie to a gullible little girl like that!

 _She bends down towards Suzy, who is a little confused about what's going on._

Candace: _(In a voice that sounds like a parent talking to a baby)_ Don't listen to the lying bunny, honey. It is weally Bunny Season, not Ducky Season.

Isabella: No, Candace, you're wrong. It's Ducky Season.

Candace: _(Stands up and looks down at Isabella)_ Look, Isabella, you probably didn't get the memo, it's Bunny Season!

Isabella: Ducky Season!

Candace: Bunny Season!

Isabella: Ducky Season!

Candace: Bunny Season!

Isabella: Ducky Season!

Candace: _(More Irritated)_ Bunny Season!

Isabella: Bunny Season!

Candace: Ducky Season!

Isabella: Bunny Season!

Candace: It's Ducky Season, I say! Ducky Season! So fire, you little brat!

 _And as expected… [BOOM!]_

 _As the gun smoke clears, Candace's hair and beak are revealed to be spinning around in opposite directions, much to her shock and annoyance. Her hair and beak slowly stop in their reversed positions, which Isabella finds quite amusing._

Isabella: _[Girly Giggle]_

Candace: _(Her beak reversed)_ Laugh all you want, Isabella, because I'll be wiping that smile off your face in a minute!

 _She moves her beak and hair into their right positions._

Isabella: Wanna go through that again?

Candace: Yes, let's! This time I will start!

Isabella: Very well then.

 _Candace moves the gun's aim onto Isabella._

Candace: Bunny Season!

 _Isabella moves the gun's aim onto Candace, and vice versa._

Isabella: Ducky Season!

Candace: Bunny Season!

 _Isabella is about to do the same again, but she moves the gun back to her._

Isabella: Bunny Season!

 _Candace points the gun's aim towards herself._

Candace: Ducky Season! Fire!

 _[BOOM!]_

This time Candace's hair gets into a mess like in the Phineas and Ferb episode 'The Fast and the Phineas'. Her beak has also been shot backwards and into a tree, the front end of the beak is stuck in the tree.

Candace: _[Muffled Speech] (Translation: Uno momento, por favor.)_

 _She stomps off screen, frustrated, to get her beak back._

Isabella: _[Louder girly giggle]_

 _Candace walks back with her beak back on, and shakes her hair about until it goes back to normal._

Candace: OK, that does it! This time you start!

Isabella: Right.

Candace: You won't win this time!

 _Isabella moves the gun's aim onto her._

Isabella: Bunny.

 _Candace does the same._

Candace: Ducky! Fire!

 _[BOOM!] Candace looks the same as normal._

Candace: _(Realizing that nothing has happened)_ Ha! I bet you can't do that, Isabella!

 _Unfortunately, her beak and her hair drop to the ground. [Clinking sounds]_

Candace: _(Looks towards us with a disgusted facial expression)_ You just can't win!

Isabella: _[Laughing harder than before]_

 _While Isabella continues laughing, Candace picks up her hair and beak and puts them back in their correct positions as she just makes a blank stare. Isabella slowly stops laughing and wipes her tears from crying with laughter._

Candace: Oh well, better get outta here before I get shot some more. Candace Duck is out! Peace!

 _She makes the peace sign and runs away as quickly as she can, with Suzy hot on her tail feathers._

Suzy: Hey! Get back here, you pencil-necked, screwball ducky!

 _She attempts to shoot Candace again but no bullets come out. [Click] Suzy stops running and looks at her gun, disappointed._

Suzy: Aww! I've run out of bullets!

 _Isabella catches up with Suzy._

Isabella: Run out of bullets?

 _She calls out to Candace who is still running for her life._

Isabella: Hey, Candy, did you hear that? She ran out of bullets!

 _Candace screeches to a halt. [Car Screeches]_

Candace: _(Beaming like a Cheshire Cat)_ She ran out of bullets?

 _She dashes back to Isabella and Suzy._

Candace: _(Still smiling)_ Ran out of bullets?

 _Isabella nods proudly. Candace's smile fades to suspicion._

Candace: Wait. I'd better check.

 _She snatches the gun away from Suzy._

Candace: Give me that!

 _She looks through the muzzle of the gun, only for the gun to blast her again._

Suzy: _(Proudly)_ Well, what a surprise! There was one bullet left!

Isabella: One bullet left? _(Calls out to Candace_ ) Oh, Candy! Did you hear? There was…

Candace: _(Angry)_ Wouldn't you'd think that I'd know already?!

 _The bullet is in an irritated Candace's right eye._

 _Much later, Isabella is standing up on a small ladder hammering a sign on a tree, saying 'Duck Season Open'. She climbs down the ladder and carries it while sneaking away. Candace quickly arrives and sees the sign._

Candace: Hmm… very clever. _(Growing a mischievous grin and looking at us)_ But not clever enough!

 _She turns around and sees Suzy coming, which pleases her._

Candace: Ah, here's Little Miss Hunter now!

 _Candace tiptoes away off screen away from Suzy, who is skulking with her loaded shotgun in her hands towards Candace. The teenaged duck pops out from behind a tree, wearing Isabella's clothing, along with a black-haired wig, pink bow, ears and feet; her buck teeth and cottontail. She presses her left hand on a tree and pretends she is eating a carrot, trying to imitate Isabella. Suzy is very confused by what she sees._

Candace: _(Imitating Isabella)_ Hey, gal! _[Imitating munching sound]_ Whatcha doin'? _(Imitates munching again)_

Suzy: Hunting.

Candace: Ooh! Hunting for what? I hope it's ducks. It is Duck Season today, after all.

 _Just then, Isabella, wearing Candace's clothing, arrives dressed with a fake beak, duck feet and an orange-haired wig. Trying to imitate Candace, she looks extremely irritated._

Isabella: _(Imitating Candace)_ Hold it right there, Isabella! Ooh, you're sooo busted! Tell me right now where you heard about it being Duck Season!

Candace: Just read that sign and it'll explain everything! If you're able enough to read, that is.

 _She points to the sign, which causes Isabella and Suzy turn to read it, but it doesn't say 'Duck Season Open', it says 'Bunny Season Open'. Candace doesn't notice this, however._

Candace: I suggest you do what needs to be done!

 _And so Suzy does! [BOOM!] This causes Candace's rabbit ears and buck teeth to blow away, due to the impact of the gun, and her pink dress and wig to burn away into ashes. Suzy sees that it was actually Candace and her eyes turn to sorrow._

Suzy: Oops!

 _While Isabella smiles smugly at what has happened, Candace is most definitely unamused as she slowly walks towards Isabella, looking down at her._

Candace: _(Normal Voice)_ You know what, Isabella?

Isabella: _(Normal Voice)_ What?

Candace: You're despicable!

Isabella: _[Giggles] (Walks away to her rabbit hole)_ Oh, Candace, p-leeease!

Candace: _(Follows Isabella)_ I'm serious! You are despicable! You're the most despicablest animal I have ever met in all my life!

 _As Candace continues rambling, they both remove their disguises and into their normal clothes; Isabella, with a bored expression, mimes: "Yeah, yeah, yeah. Blah, blah, blah."_

Candace: I mean, it is beyond me how anyone can get as despicable as you! How one person can get as despicable as that in a millennium is unbelievable! Even though I haven't met a lot of people on this Earth, I know that you would be more despicable than them by a thousand times!

 _As Candace and Isabella reach the latter's rabbit hole, Isabella reaches into the hole and picks out a book with the title inscribed at the front: '1000 Ways To Cook A Duck' and reads through it._

Candace: Yes, I have said it before, and I will say it again! You are des… _(Starts realising what the book cover says) des… despi… ca… ca… ba… ble._

Isabella: Mmm! Just wait till you hear the recipes in this book, Suzy! They're delicioso!

 _Candace looks at us._

Candace: Meap!

Isabella: 'Allspice Duck with Braised Choy'. Yummy! That sounds good, doesn't it?

 _Suzy is still confused as Candace looks at her with a worried facial expression._

Isabella: 'Duck Breasts with Rhubarb-Cherry Chutney'. Mmm hmm!

Candace: Two can play at that game!

 _She reaches into the rabbit hole and instantly picks out a similar cook book, only with the front cover having the title inscribed as '1000 Ways To Cook A Bunny' and reads through the book._

Candace: Hmmm, 'Bunny Burgers with Fries'! Yummy Yum Yum!

Isabella: 'Pan-Fried Duck Breasts With Dried Cherry-Port Sauce'. Mmmm! You can't deny that sounds extremely delicious!

Candace: Ha! Not as delicious as this: 'Roast Bunny Loin with Moroccan-Style Couscous and Calamari'. Now that's what I call 'truly exquisite'!

 _The two animal girls look at Suzy eagerly._

Isabella and Candace: _(In Unison)_ So, who's on the menu tonight?

Suzy: Uh, I'm sorry, Miss Bunny and Miss Ducky. I'm a vegetarian. I just hunt for fun of it. It's my sport. _[High-Pitched Evil Giggle]_

Isabella quickly sprints up to Suzy with an angry look on her face and pushes her face against Suzy's.

Isabella: Now, look here, young lady! Why don't you choose a different sport which doesn't include terrifying us innocent woodland creatures!

 _She stands back up and calms down._

Isabella: Like, for example… _(Clicks her fingers)_

 _Candace skips across the screen wearing her bright pink swimming suit that her Human form wore in the episode 'De Plane! De Plane!'._

Candace: Woo Hoo! Woo Hoo! Anyone for a swim?

 _This, however, only makes her get… [BOOM!] The redheaded duck walks back across the screen, dazed from the blast, with her hair, feathers and swimming suit burnt._

Candace: What a swim!

Suzy: _(Pushing her gun against Isabella's chest angrily)_ And guess what, you pesky, gigantic bunny! You're next!

 _[BOOM!] Isabella manages to avoid the shot._

Isabella: Yikes!

 _She and Candace desperately flee from Suzy, who is endlessly shooting bullets at them, but all of them missing. The girls eventually reach Isabella's Rabbit Hole, and the two animals dive in. Suzy stands outside the hole, pointing her gun at the hole, waiting for the animals to come out._

Suzy: Alright, you pests, come out and surrender your hide, or I'll blast you out myself!

 _Isabella's hand peeks out of the hole and sticks her finger in the muzzle of the gun. The top half of her body comes out of the hole and looks at Suzy._

Isabella: _[Tutting]_ How could you, Suzy? Don't you know it's against the law to hunt animals like us with an elephant gun?!

Suzy: This is an elephant gun?

Isabella: That's right. So go shoot an elephant!

 _As Isabella descends back into her hole, Suzy looks at her gun and shrugs._

Suzy: Okay then, I'll go shoot an elephant.

 _She turns around and sees a huge elephant standing in front of her._

Elephant: You do, and I'll give ya such a spank!

 _It walks forward, stepping on Suzy. This pushes her into the ground with only her head poking out of the ground, cross-eyed and stars spinning around her head._

 _Much later, Suzy is trudging through the forest, frustrated, hunting for Isabella and Candace._

Suzy: Grrr! Once I find those two giant animals, I'll give them both a blast that they will never forget!

 _Behind Suzy, Candace dressed as a hound, walking on all fours; wearing fake dog ears and a toilet plunger on her butt, is following Suzy. Candace does this by imitating a dog._

Candace: Ruff ruff ruff ruff!

 _Suzy stops and turns around to see Candace in her dog disguise running up to her, still imitating a dog._

Suzy: _(Smiling)_ Awww! A puppy!

Candace: Ruff ruff ruff ruff!

Suzy: _(Suddenly becomes scared) N-n-nice puppy._

 _Candace strikes a 'pointer' pose towards Suzy._

Candace: Grrrr!

 _A bullet is suddenly shot at Suzy's hat from behind Candace, causing it to blow away, due to the impact._

Suzy: _[Screams]_ Hey! Watch where you're shooting that gun, you little… _[Gasps]_

 _She suddenly sees someone who makes her heart leap. It's Isabella disguised as a masculine boy hunter, wearing a red jumper and hunter's cap, dark green trousers and dark brown galoshes. Her pink bow has been removed, and her hair style has changed to Elvis's, to make her look handsome, with her ears kept in her hair to avoid blowing cover._

Isabella: _[Deeper Voice)_ Oh, uh, sorry about that, little lady. _(Spits on the ground and walks up to Suzy, who is simply love-struck by Isabella)_ My gun didn't hurt ya, did she, darlin'?

Suzy: Uh… _[Stuttering]_ N-n-no, she didn't.

Isabella: Phew! By the way… _(Leans forward towards Suzy)_ is your name as cute as your face? _[Growls]_

 _Suzy tugs at her collar in embarrassment, while smiling nervously._

Suzy: Why, yes, it actually is. _[Nervous girly chuckle]_ It's…

 _Candace bites her leg._

Suzy: _[Yells]_ Yow! _(Hops around, holding her leg in pain) Ow, ow, ow, ow!_

Isabella: Ooh, I'm so sorry! Naughty puppy, naughty! He's just impossible! Really, I can't take him anywhere.

 _One of Isabella's ears pokes out of her hair. Suzy soon stops and sees that it is actually Isabella in disguise, which makes her extremely angry. The bunny notices that her cover has been blown, and gives a wide nervous smile at Suzy, who takes away Isabella's gun and pushes the muzzle against her chest._

Suzy: Okay, Bunny! I've had enough! No more fun and games! Now, you're finished!

 _Candace attempts to tiptoe away unnoticed, but Suzy turns around and pushes her gun against Candace's back, halting the teenaged duck._

Suzy: And that goes for you too, ducky!

 _Candace turns around._

Candace: But you can't shoot me! It's Bunny Season! Says so on that poster over there! _(Points at a poster on a nearby tree, which has the words inscribed on it saying 'Bunny Season')_ See?

 _Isabella walks up to the poster while quickly redressing into her normal clothes._

Isabella: _(Normal Voice)_ Candace, for the last time… _(Tears down poster to reveal a poster saying 'Duck Season')_ it's Ducky Season!

 _Candace runs up to the poster and tears it down, revealing a new 'Bunny Season' poster, and vice versa._

Candace: No, it's Bunny Season!

Isabella: Ducky Season!

Candace: Bunny Season!

Isabella: Ducky Season!

 _However, it is not a 'Ducky Season' poster this time, it is a new poster with a picture of Suzy on it, with writing inscribed under it saying 'Suzy Season'. The two animals read it and turn to Suzy with devious smiles, who backs away nervously._

Suzy: Eh oh!

 _Bullets are shot at her from off screen, only for her to duck just in time and run away in fear, crying._

Suzy: Mommy!

 _Behind her, Isabella and Candace dressed like Suzy skulk through the trees with wicked grimaces, just like how Suzy did. They both turn to us and make the shush sign._

Isabella and Candace: Shhh!

Isabella: Be very, very quiet. We're hunting Suzies.

Candace: _[Evil Giggle]_

They both continue skulking, as the cartoon ends.

 **THAT'S ALL FOLKS!**


End file.
